Whilst enjoying my cup of coffee this morning in the kitchen, I was drawn to looking at the various cook books in the cupboard – they’ve been there so long, usually I just walk past them or know exactly which one I need for a specific recipe.
This time, I noticed the many diet books hidden amongst the cookbooks – a slightly chilling throwback to being an overweight child and begging my mum to let me try various diets (& shakes) in order to lose my “puppy fat”.
Bullied at school for being overweight as well as being bullied by my own “dad” about being “big boned” & “you’ll never be slim” gave me a huge complex about my body image, and it did so for most of my life – it became part of my ego’s self story.
Don’t get me wrong, I still have moments when I judge myself for eating a bit too much or not going to the gym often enough; however I’m still learning, and I’m nowhere near as harsh with myself as I used to be, thanks to learning how to be more present in my life instead of allowing past failures or future fears take over my mind.
Anyway, you’re here to find out why you can’t lose fat (or keep it off) and the answer is; there are multiple reasons for this (& they’re not all your own fault… however, some are your fault, which is a good thing – this means you have the power to change it around).
We all know why we’re fat; it’s because we don’t “eat less & move more”
While, as a personal trainer, I know this is 100% correct; as a human, I understand it’s not as simple as that.
“Eat less, move more” sounds so easy, however complicated factors also come into play;
- Hormones
- Emotional eating
- Mindless eating
- Fear of failure
- Wanting quick results…
And I can understand all of these.
I used to binge eat.
It was a compulsion.
A way of silencing the noise in my mind as well as release dopamine.
Yet, what followed was guilt.
Shame.
Judgement & self punishment.
I’m not going to pretend I totally understand the ins and outs as to why some of us binge eat, I’m no doctor or therapist, however becoming aware of the compulsion and directing my attention towards moving more really helped.
We’re humans, biologically we need to move.
Our ancestors used to have to hunt for food, build their own homes, flee from lions… we had to be physically fit to survive.
Now? We rely on skinny jabs or fad diets to lose weight, and exercise (to many, not all) is seen as a chore.
How did humans become so sedentary and entitled?
I say this because a lot of people moan about being fat, yet rely on fast food, sit and watch TV and expect the NHS to give them skinny jabs so they can lose fat fast.
This is a fast-track to an early grave.
Where has the joy gone from going to the park for a kick about?
Joining a class at the gym and socialising?
Prioritising more nutritious foods over trans fat-laden takeaways?
Relying on skinny jabs and diets pills, only to then put on more fat as soon as you stop using them?
What I’m saying may sound harsh, but sometimes the truth is harsh
The fundamental reason as to why people are fat is this – they don’t dedicate time to creating a healthy lifestyle.
To lose fat AND maintain it, the following must be considered;
- Learning about nutritious foods and changing what you buy in the supermarket (no more mindlessly buying crap food, more consciously buying healthy foods – and yes, they can be delicious)
- Finding a way of moving more that you enjoy – gardening counts, so does going for a walk in nature (great for clearing the mind too), going to the gym and joining a class if you’re a beginner to get you started, dancing in the living room…
- Being more mindful of when you have food cravings – why are you having them? Are you stressed? Bored? (of course, you can have the odd treat, however they must be consumed mindfully – not mindlessly reaching for a chocolate bar without thinking about it)
- Listen to your body – if you need rest, then do so, however I’ve learned that on the days I struggle to go to the gym and go anyway, some of those times have been my best workouts.
Fad diets and skinny jabs aren’t going to save you – what will is changing your lifestyle.
And when you make a commitment to do this and start putting it into action, I bet you your mindset begins to change too; you’ll become more positive, feel lighter (physically and mentally) & will begin to look forward to the little things in life – & grateful for them too.
If you suffer from the fear of failure, this means you’re not in the present moment – your mind is stuck incessantly thinking about past failures of when you tried to lose weight before.
This makes you give up before even getting started.
Instead, try this;
When the fear of failure begins to rear it’s ugly head, stop it in it’s tracks.
Tell it, you’re not interested about what’s happened in the past – you’re a different version of you now.
Ground yourself by taking deep breaths and focusing on how your body is feeling – feel your feet on the ground, notice your chest rising and falling as you breathe.
Become totally still, feeling the power of your presence in this moment.
Then, take action towards one thing you can change – whether you have time to go for a walk or put some music on to jump around and dance to; this will change your energy and lift your vibe.
Those times I force myself to go to the gym, put my earphones in and get cracking with some cardio, 100% of the time I feel much happier and lighter afterwards.
And this is from someone who in her late-teens/early twenties froze with anxiety over the thought of stepping foot in a gym, even though she desperately wanted to try it out. (Look out for my post on how to overcome this fear).
I’m not saying it’s easy, however the concept of losing fat is very simple
You owe it to yourself to live a happier, healthier life – why not take steps towards it today?
Change things, bit by bit, and you’ll end up NOT focusing on losing fat, instead, you’ll be focusing on a happier, more positive life (and enjoy it in the process).
